Love, unexpected.

I found myself at a standstill when it comes to writing appealing posts. I feel like everyone already feels what I feel, so how can I write about an original experience when everyone has already had mine? University is finished for the year, I am back to doing what I longed to do, but recently it’s been a lot harder…

And it’s because of him. This man, who appeared from the fog that brought a warm day. With kisses that take sorrow away from me - swallowed whole. I can barely find a worry to write about. He provides me comfort in the nights I crave the companionship, holds my face and kisses me with the softness only one would know when touching the hand of God. He would move mountains for me and come back from the grave if it meant it would make me smile. I am so in love that now I cannot write about despair. It feels foolish, unkept, a shun. I have so many notes on how a past lover has made me feel, but when I go to write all those feelings have faded, and I can’t bring up a single tear.

Last night, while I was high, I asked him to tuck me in because the tightness of the sheets around my body felt like a long-forgotten hug. He willingly tucked me in, kissed my head and said he loved me very dearly. I cried. I spent the next 5 minutes crying and feeling like a child that found out about the cruel fate of mortality. My love, this knight in armour, kissing my brow and speaking softly to me, is actually my love.

Which means now I have nothing to write about because for so long I wrote about heartbreak, despair, sorrow, and now I am showered in what is the closest thing to the sun of love and comfort. I have many thoughts on the world, on death, anything I have seen and felt - I want to write about it, but the original experience doesn’t feel so original when I write about how death is fickle, the Gods are in everything, so on, so on.

Maybe something will come around.